Thursday, October 9, 2008

black holes and warrior princesses

Boys kind of like to mess with things, too.

Remember a few weeks back when those scientists in Switzerland tried to rape the entire freaking universe by creating a small black hole?

Well, I think it landed on Wall Street. Or Iceland. I mean, if boys could make mini-black holes in their garages, what boy could honestly say he wouldn't want to do that? I'd probably make a black hole and then put it in the arena of death with a potato bug and a black widow.


If you think I'm sexist... well, okay. Remember the English professor who told me that Ghost Medicine was misogynistic?

Yeah... whatever.

But there's nothing wrong with generalizing things out to an entire gender. There are always going to be certain predispositions and talents that are more attributable to one sex rather than the other. It's true in most things, but especially in education (and I'm not entirely through with that topic yet, either).

Girls, for example, make better "warrior princesses." (I will admit I downloaded a few pictures of Xena this afternoon)

I've decided to add a likeness of Xena, Warrior Princess to the Shrine of Protection. I am still winning the battle against the room that kills people, but I've noticed that they've turned the air conditioner down to a setting called "Iceland," (no doubt in an attempt to attract the wandering black hole) and the thermostat cannot be controlled by human beings.

Oh... to top things off... next week is ALA's Teen Read Week (Yay!). So, guess what the school did? They invited an author of one fantasy book that came out in 2004 to come in and speak to the kids about "being published."


Fantasy. Dragons. Wizards. Good thing it doesn't mention the V Word.

I guess the topic should be "having, at one time, been published."


"Long, long, ago."

"In a land called Gorgngal."


It's okay... it's okay. My feelings are not diminished. They were sucked out a long time ago when I fucked around with a black hole in my garage when I was a teenager. I hate kids anyway. And don't even get me started on fantasy, much less my having a multi-book contract.

I guess they haven't figured out that the room that kills people, the black hole, and the "Iceland" temperature zone setting have not killed me yet.

Thanks, among other deities, to Xena.