Maybe a week ago, I un-reviewed S.A. Bodeen's summer 2012 release The Raft.
So if you need to know what an un-review is, you can check that one out. Basically, I think that authors don't have any business reviewing other authors' works. Not unless they really want to get into a public pissing match -- which is always quite enjoyable -- or perhaps get into an overly-salivated public display of face-sucking -- which is always kind of gross.
Anyway, I am going to un-review Bodeen's novel again in August, which is when the book comes out.
But this one, BZRK, by Michael Grant, comes out on Tuesday.
You must get this book. That is all.
What is it with my writer friends getting all good and matured in their writing? I mean I get it and everything, but I so rarely see writers actually developing their chops over the course of their publication. This is true: Most writers keep churning out the same level of stuff (and usually the same plots and themes) over the course of their careers.
Yawn.
That's just not for me as a reader. As I said last time:
I once saw a man eat a fluorescent light tube!
He appeared to enjoy himself tremendously!
That's probably why I wanted to un-review both of these books. I have read Michael's earlier books (and S.A. Bodeen's, too), and I think Mr. Grant has really poured something deeper and more darkly grotesque from his black, twisted soul directly onto the pages of BZRK.
Read this book with latex gloves on.
Trust me.
Here's what you know from the cover: There is a little bug thingy, and it is inside an eyeball of what looks like an insane person.
That is really all I need to say.
Now I will tell you a story about Michael Grant.
This is a true story.
I believe we first met in 2008. I could be wrong. So much of the road behind me is distorted in the vibrations from the loose rear-view mirror attached to the windshield of my life.
It was at a writer's thing where there were lots of authors, librarians, booksellers, and bloggers.
That meant we were the only two men in the room.
[Anecdotal observation: In 2012, given the same environment, I think there would be four men in the room now.]
We have come a long way, baby!
Usually in these situations, I have to attach myself invisibly to someone's elbow. I did this to Jackie Kessler and A.S. King when I was in Chicago. I get so desperately paralyzed in these situations!
But at this particular event in 2008 I was absolutely alone, an orphan.
And it was in, like, this big hall of cheese.
Seriously.
It was desperate!
I was alone in a hall of cheese. There were all these fancy tables that looked like fantasy cities with towering spires of cheese cascades -- with currants and flatbreads and brie, brie, brie!
Oh.
And there was an open bar, too.
Anyway, I kept my eyes down. I was terrified and alone, and the only time I'd made eye contact that evening was with a matronly bookseller who'd assumed I had to have been a waiter, so she asked me to bring her a basket of fresh rolls.
What could I do?
I had to bring her some bread!
And she didn't even tip!
Okay. So Michael Grant was there. Towering against the wall, watching my pathetic performance art, poised beside a stack of his novel Gone, and ARCs of Hunger. I believe he held a glass -- Scotch with ice.
When he came up to me, I was nearly convinced he was going to ask me to bring him a fruit bowl or slip me a fiver and ask me to do a card trick, or shit like that, but I was wrong. Michael Grant actually knew who I was. His wife, who is such an amazingly talented writer -- Katherine Applegate -- had actually read my book.
Grant and Applegate -- that's some serious writer shit going on.
Anyway, he said something along the lines of how I looked immeasurably pathetic and didn't I think I should go have a whiskey with him and talk about guy stuff?
Michael Grant saved me!
He will always be my hero!
Mission for Monday: Go buy some latex gloves.
Tuesday: Go get BZRK.
My apologies to my usual book borrowers. I won't be lending out BZRK. There's something inside it.
Besides all the gross stuff.
It is this:
15 comments:
Every time you recommend a book, somewhere out there, a writer loses a finger. And I lose $10-$20.
Thanks for that.
I may have to start reading those books now. Thank You.
Taylor, I think you will really like BZRK. Just remember, though, you are not allowed to let Michael Grant be your favorite author.
But seriously, this book is so INTENSE. After you read it, go pick up GONE, too. That's a terrific series by Michael Grant, who, by my calculations, now owes me something like five drinks in our pimp-each-others'-books drinking game.
Thanks for that, Andrew. To be immodest, I did feel I bumped my game up a bit for BZRK. And I want to tell you that I've felt challenged to do so by you, especially by reading Ghost Medicine and later Marbury. You've become a voice in the back of my head saying things like, "I can go there, why can't you, you giant pandering market-driven sell-out?"
That's not an actual quote. Just your imaginary voice in my head. You and Kraus in particular have pushed me out of my comfortable groove. I really can't have people going around making me look timid.
But one thing. Dude. Scotch with ice? Calumny! It would have to be some pretty lousy Scotch for me to drink it anything other than neat. It was Jack Daniels, because that's all they had.
Thank god it was only Jack.
Other than that, I'm not sure I belong in this conversation.
Michael is telling the truth. I remember now. It was Jack Daniel's. And -- good God! -- I actually had some.
I feel so dirty.
I think I have only tasted that stuff twice in my lifetime. I can't remember the other time, but I know there was a fistfight involved.
First I'm reading Gone then bzrk. Getting both from my favorite indie - Books of Wonder.
Every time you recommend a book, I read it. Every time I read a book recommended by you, I enjoy it immensely and grow as a reader and writer. Thanks for that.
Personally, I find Michael Grant's work some of the best in this business of YA books. BZRK is a must-read, as far as I am concerned.
We can't have latex in the house, so what do you recommend as a backup?
One of the things I like best about Grant's books is that each one is so different than any other book out there. He really puts his career on the line and never plays it safe. I look forward to reading BZRK and getting the same experience.
Regarding your writing friends maturing in their writing: I have the same thing with my small group of loyal writers. They are moving on to bizarre and fantastical things while I'm still stuck writing coming out stories with dragons.
My first thought was, "There is no way Michael Grant had ice in his whisky." For a minute my world went off its axis.
I am relieved and back on axis. But also bummed. You were reduced to JD? Gah. Now my stomach is distressed.
I have a hip flask and The Macallan for the ALA all set.
I am an optimist. I think now there might be as many men as I have fingers. And I have all my fingers. Because, look, there's you and MG and DK and JL and Matthew and Jonathan. See, that's one hand!
I am thrilled about BZRK. Going to get two copies. One for the Angel Potatoes and one for me.
Jon: Coming out stories with dragons? Dude! I wanna read!!
I met Katherine Applegate last week at our Literacy Cafe Schmooze for Ivan. Lovely lady!
But I forgot to bring BZRK to the SCIBA dinner :/ It's ok, more importantly, I *have* BZRK! Just not as pleasantly inscribed as yours ;D
@Kristen - he did have a Scotch in his Powerpoint presentation. And hookers. It was a very unpredictable Children's Lit dinner.
I'm busy BZRKing, except I am teaching and have a break. Andrew, I agree with everything you said and more.@Alethea: I wish I had seen that PowerPoint. I wish I had met The Man and Katherine Applegate and had time to chat with you.
Andrew. Latex won't do. I'm thinking biohazard suit. Level 4. And I am reconsidering my mascara boycott. I had no idea that mascara might confound...you know.
So...I picked up this book while in NY and read it on the way home. You were right. BZRK is insane in all the best ways. Thanks for un-reviewing it.
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